On My Knees

I usually just write these things down on my own private computer, where no one can see. I never thought I would start a blog... I'm not sure why, I just didn't. But talking about how I feel, writing it down is just part of who I am. So here it goes:

So many times I get discouraged, I cry. I get mad that I can't seem to do anything right. I feel alone when I know I'm not. I try to stay happy all the time. But I just can't do that. I cannot act like those words didn't sting or this rejection didn't cut me deep. Its at this point, my breaking point, that I fall on my knees. I find that you're at a better place to worship if you're already down.

I love my God. He is my Savior, my Comforter, my Strong Tower, and all I need. Though up until last year I hadn't really experienced the absolute fire burning for Him. M-Fuge camp changed my life. I firmly believe that. It broke me. And you cannot get what is better until you see what is wrong. M-Fuge showed me that. I was never a drinker or a druggie or a slut(Im still not) but I was not living my life for His Glory and now thats what I strive for. To be the bigger person, if that means I need to sacrifice my pride, then so be it. I'm willing. Worship songs bring tears into my eyes because now I know just how AMAZING and freeing His love can be.

Now, here I am. Living my life for Him. When its hard, when I want to break down, I let those tears fall. And praise His wonderful name since He is there to catch them.